Ladies and gentlemen, not a single one of you will care about this as much as I do, but let me nonetheless try to impart my excitement.
MY PLANTS BORE FRUIT!!!
And in case that was not sufficiently up close and personal:
Friends, let me tell you. I had completely given up hope. (Almost). And then, just like that, with very little effort on my part, those little beautiful cherry tomatoes appeared.
Good one universe. You had me going there for a second.